, , , , , , , , ,

“But, as it is written, ‘what no eye has seen, nor heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him.'” 2 Corinthians 2:9

I am a planner. To-do lists and schedules excite and calm me.

Presently, I am unable to make to-do lists or even plan to attend events months in advance. Why? Because I have no idea what is next. Well, I know that I will be sitting for the bar exam on July 25th & 26th; I know that in two weeks I will have an intimate graduation dinner; I know that in one month one of my best friends will be getting married. However, I do not know what my daily life will entail. Where will I work?; How long will I have to live with family until I am able to get my own apartment again? In which country, state, city will I live? Most importantly, what community will I be a part of? So many unknowns. The planner in me would love to have all of the answers to these questions. Yet, the planner in me knows better. You see, God has had to repeatedly remind me that as His Word says, His plans are greater. A combination of personal experience and spiritual maturation causes me to trust that God’s plans for me are better than what I can come up with. (Isaiah 55:9). The plans that I create are limited by the life that I have lived; the places that I have visited or am interested in visiting; what I think I am capable of doing, the things I have seen others do and therefore know are possible. And well, God’s plans are not limited by anything because God is not limited in His knowledge.

Fortunately for me, God is the one making the plans and He knows what is best for me in the long run. So I am in this scary yet exciting place where I do not know what is next and have to fully trust in God. I am the young child taking her first steps, one foot in front of the other, walking into the arms of my beloved Father Who is a few steps away with His arms wide open telling me that I can do it and reassuring me that He has gone ahead of me and will catch me when I fall. What a relief!

The season of walking in the unknown forces me to cling to the known and unchanging God. Although I cannot plan where I will go next, I can plan with Whom I will go. I can plan to spend time with God; I can plan to dive into His Word; I can plan to show Christ’s love to those around me; I can plan to serve whichever community I am a part of; I can plan to nurture relationship relationships. So although I cannot plan the “big” things, I can plan the “small”. I can choose to focus on what I do know as opposed to focusing on what I do not know.